Ribs

The apartment complex that I live at is very old and the steps are worn down and are as smooth as a baby’s butt. The last Thursday in November, we had a rain storm, and the steps were slicker then glass. I was simply running down the stairs in my thongs (OK, GET THAT VISUAL OUT OF YOUR HEAD! I KNOW THAT WAS FRIGHTENING!) a.k.a “flip-flops”, simply taking out the rubbish and checking on my laundry, being the Susie Homemaker that I am, before heading to bed, when I got to the 3rd to last step and my feet slipped from underneath and I flew up into the air and landed right on my ribs onto the last step. I could not get up. I could not move. I could not breathe, for what seemed an eternity. Finally, I dragged myself upstairs, clutching my back in excruciating pain. I tried to lie down, but, it hurt too much. I took some over the counter pain meds and waited for the pain to subside, but, it never did. So, I had to face it, I knew something was wrong. But, how to get to hospital? (by the way, you don't say: "the hospital", it is simply referred to as "hospital"). So, how to get to hospital? I don't know how to dial for the ambo! (ambo is how you say ambulance!) then, a vague recollection of reading somewhere, on some sign that emergency services could be reached by dialling 000. After much sobbing, wailing and gnashing of teeth, I finally managed to get an ambo dispatched to the house.




I spent the next several hours in the ER waiting room amusing myself by watching a crazy lady on crutches storming around the waiting room (as best as one can storm about on crutches) cursing at the top of her lungs like a drunken sailor about how she had been waiting there for hours, for days! (I feel your pain, sister!), watching the police escort a guy in with handcuffs who was crying and wailing with promises that he would never do it again, if they would just let him go and so forth, when, at about 2 or 3 o’clock in the morning, the doctor FINALLY got around to looking at my x-rays, and realized that, hey, I really was injured, and wasn't, as Roy so often use to love to say "another drug seeking dirt ball", they whisked me off into the ward, where I spent the next SIX days. Silly me, I thought I would only be in hospital for a brief stint, not an extended stay. So, I brought nothing with me, not clean clothes, no books, no telephone calling card. Turns out, I had TWO broken ribs and a lacerated liver. OUCH!



On the bright side, the entire time I was there, I was hopped up on morphine!!! Weeeeeeee……!!!!! Straight from the machine into my arm with an IV. After spending several days this way, I affectionately named my machine “Peachy”. As in, “How are you doing??” “just Peachy”. Because of the laceration in my liver, I was not permitted to even take a pee without assistance. Not to worry though, life is grand when you have pumped up with morphine!

I would spend the entire day just snoozing…earplugs in my ears, a pair of clean knickers (underwear) over my eyes. One day, however, the pain medicine “team”, in their infinite wisdom, decided to adjust my pain medicine and add something new to the mix. Needless to say, it did NOT go over well. As soon as it coursed through my veins, my eyes popped open, my heart started pounding wildly! I threw the knickers off my eyes, I took the earplugs out of my ears and ripped the oxygen out of my nose, and pulled off my elastic tights. I had to get out of there! I stormed down the hall, towards the elevator, in my hospital gown, dragging Peachy behind me. The nurses were chasing after me “Renee! Ms Palmer! What are you doing? Where are you going??” I informed them under no uncertain terms, that I was leaving. I was going home! Needless to say, this plan was not received with great enthusiasm. Just the opposite. So, with my grand escape plot was foiled and I was escorted back to bed, where the pain team was hastily summoned to readjust my meds.

After a few more days of misery, I was released from my prison cell and permitted to return home. As I had no clean clothes, I marched outside in my hospital gown and waited in the taxi queue. I am sure there is a lesson or two to be learned from this entire, miserable experience, although I have yet to figure out what it is. However, one tip that I did learn is, that if you wait for a taxi in long taxi queue, in your hospital gown, you will immediately be moved to the front of the line. You may want to try this sometime when you are in a hurry.

Ah, home sweet home! I was so overjoyed to be there, that I did not let anything rain on my parade. Not the fact that the property manager STILL had not arranged to get my broken window fixed, (let’s see, it’s been HOW many months now? Three???) and that pesky possum had figured out how to get passed the cardboard barrier that I had taped up before my most unfortunate incident and had proceed to have a party with some other possums in my bathroom. Again. Ah, welcome home, home sweet home!!!

Brisbane

Well, I have been here almost a year! And I haven't posted any pictures of Brisbane! So, here you go....

Brisbane view from Mt. Cootha



I take City Cat or walk to work...Here is City Cat under the Story Bridge



Brisbane along the river





The famous Story bridge. And, yes, those are people on top of the bridge! There are currently three bridges in the world that you can climb, one in New Zealand, one in Sydney, and this one, the Story Bridge! And yes, I have done it! And, being scared of heights, I was terrified! I had to talk to myself the entire time..."You can do it, one step at a time, you can do it..."

Guys working on Story Bridge...

On Story Bridge, looking toward New Farm, where I live...



On Story Bridge, looking toward New Farm, where I live, but, on the other side of the River...



Story Bridge At Night

Handcuffs

It has been a rough, few months. The first in a string of tragedies and difficult events was my father’s passing a few months ago. I went to Flint Michigan for my father's funeral and to bring my mother back here. Ah and what a trip is was! What a week from hell. To top it off, the “Dashing Doctor” was suppose to fly in to be with me, and ended up cancelling because of the tropical storm in North Carolina. (Just for the record, his flight left on time).

My mom was such a basket case by Friday night (the night before we were going to leave for Australia) she said to me and Nick: "I know there is something important that I have to do tomorrow, but, I just can't think of what it is". Me and Nick just looked at each other. I said "ah...mom??? you are leaving for Australia tomorrow?" “Ah yes, I knew there was something important I had to do tomorrow”. Oohhhh.....kayyy.....

But, the crowning moment was on Friday. My sister, Charna, went with me to the library so that we could use the internet to get my mom's vistor’s visa. That turned out to be too complicated, so, we went to AAA to get it there, which is conveniently located by the mall. So, of course, Charna wanted to go shopping. After I dragged her out of Macy's, we finally got in mom's car and headed home, late as usual.

I noticed that this police car seemed to be following me. I knew I wasn't doing anything wrong, I hadn't been drinking (well, I had a drink at lunch time, but, that was hours ago), and I was adhering to the speed limit. Yet, I would switch lanes, they would switch lanes. Charna said "pull into a parking lot", and I said no, I am not doing anything wrong. I looked again, and they were gone, they had pulled into a Kmart parking lot. Shew, just my imagination. Yet, a few minutes later, there they were - again! Now, I was really getting nervous. Sure enough "WHOOP, WHOOP", and the blue lights start flashing. It is a 4 land busy road with no shoulder, so, I just eased over to the cube and turned off the car. I then look in my rear view mirror, and was stunned to see that the police office had his door open and was crouched behind it, and was pointing a gun...AT ME!

He yelled "DRIVER - THROW your keys on the road".
I threw my keys out into the road.
He yelled at me to GET OUT OF THE CAR NOW and S L O W L Y and put my hands up in the air where he could see them.
I got out of the car S L O W L Y and put my hands up in the air where he could see them.
He then yelled at me to turn around and walk backward S L O W L Y with my hands up in the air.

By now, the Mexicans across the street are all hanging out their windows and on their porches to watch the show.

I had to KNEEL ON THE ROAD, of a 4 lane major artery into the city, at which point, he ran up and slapped the handcuffs on me! all this time, I have NO IDEA what is going on. He then pushed me into the back of the first squad car.

At this point, there are now THREE squad cars there, including a sheriff and a female officer, whom I am assuming was there to escort us to jail so we couldn't say that anything "inappropriate" was done.
He then left me in the squad car, sitting sideways because my hands were cuffed behind me. the handcuff were on SO TIGHT that I did not have proper circulation in my left hand for 2 DAYS afterward.

So, what was all this about? I still didn't know. they put my sister in the other squad car. Well, as it turns out, when they were driving behind me, they ran the plate. and it showed up as a stolen vehicle. So, instead of doing a little bit of research, they immediate pull me over and put me through that. as it turns out, there was a car with a TEXAS plate with the same number as my moms that had been reported stolen. HELLO??? DID YOU NOT THINK TO CHECK ON THIS FIRST?????!!!!!!

When the knuckle head had finally figured it out, and ask us for our addresses - she said California and I said Australia. He said "what are you doing in Flint? " we said "We are here to go to our FATHER'S FUNERAL!" and then you put us through that! I just said, "may I leave now????" Can you believe that sh*t??? Then, we were REALLY late getting home and my sister in law was even more pissed at me. yes, it was a delightful trip. :-)


Welcome back to the US! I have to say, I was never so glad to go back to work in my life!! I tell you, when we landed on Australian soil, I just wanted to kiss the ground that I was going to walk on!